And the winner is.....

After using the painfully logical Random Number Generator, the winner is Mannie Vincent and her story about her granny panties! Yay!

Lee and I had many a laugh reading through the comments and making fun of everyone's awesome presents (because seriously, some of them were awesome). *And* we want to thank everyone that took time out of their day to throw their name into the hat.

So, congrats to Mannie Vincent and the distant relative that didn't want her to "go around wearing working girl underwear". Thanks to her, that phrase has made its way into our daily conversation.

Lee and I are off on a family vacation this weekend with the kiddos (Lord help us), and I'd like to leave you with a picture from a wedding that we just recently attended:

Maybe he's just trying to give Nona a piggy-back ride?

Two Dollars Would Be About Twenty Bucks Now With Inflation. That Ain't Bad.

My dad was big on diaries and goals and plans. Looking back, he was doing a lot of the new crap that schools do now, except he was doing it in the 70's. And back then, we hadn't yet invented the manly title of "journal", so the thing I wrote in was called a *diary*, plain and simple.

---

Excerpt: Dec. 26, 1978 (I was 6)

Daddy, I will try my best to not fight with my sister. And I will try my best to not shout. And to not get mad so fast. And be a good boy because, last year I had a lot of toys from santa. (sic) But this year I only got two dollers. (sic)

---

This entry has led me to three conclusions that I would like to share with fellow parents:

1) Kids, even first graders, could spell waaay better in the 70's.

2) Guilt trips work great on little kids.

3) Even little, fighting, shouting, anger-management needing, money-grubbing kids can turn out to be semi-respectable adults. Don't sweat it.

By the way, have you entered our contest? C'mon. You must've gotten a worse present than "two dollers" that you could tell us about.

There's a contest up in here, y'all.

Let's have a contest!

This year, we want you to tell us the worst gift you’ve ever received for the holidays.

Comments will be open until 11:59pm Wednesday, November 25th .

We’ll draw a winner out the comments using a fancy random number picker on Thursday, Thanksgiving Day (US).

What do you get? How about ONE OF EVERYTHING!!! We’ll send you the ENTIRE COLLECTION of HateMail and JunkMail greeting cards, as well as a 2009 HateMail 365 Calendar! This has an estimated retail value of $204.00! That’s a lot of dough, as well as a lot of special occasions COVERED. You’ll appear as though you’ve really got your shiz together when you pull out the appropriate sentiment at the perfect time.

Just go with your bad self.

So, get on with it! Tell us your most awful gift and be sure to check back on Thanskgiving day to see if your holidays just got a little sweeter.

Yum! The taste of almost-victory!

It was a TIE! I absolutely love the other card and to be honest, I was sure that they were going to win.

A big, giant thank-you to everyone who took a few minutes out of their hectic lives and voted for us. We really appreciate the support...

With that said, we're going to be having a pretty nutty giveaway on Tuesday, November 18th.

You'll understand why I'm saying 'nutty' when you see what's in store.

***Contest moved to November 20th, thanks to Super Colic Baby From Hell.

If, for some reason, you haven't voted on Etsy...

...please, do it for the babies

clearly, they're hungry

VOTE FOR JUNKMAIL HERE

Another Opportunity For You To Vote For Change

Go VOTE for us in Etsy's Best Holiday Cards 2008 contest:

VOTE HERE

('Restraining Order Be Damned')

And after you vote, buy the card.

Because everyone needs a little JunkMail

50% off your ENTIRE order!

Offer only valid until 11:59pm, November 10, 2008

coupon code: CJFW501110

Go shopping NOW

YES, WE CAN.

Going through *the change*

I've decided that I can't be a slave to html any longer.

You'll notice that the 'shop' page is a little different these days. I'm just too tired to keep making fancy updates in Dreamweaver, only to find out that I did something wrong with one of my stinkin' tables. Which won't delete. Ever. Dammit.

So, I hope you like the new setup. I like the layout and the fact that I can make it look fairly similar to the rest of the site. I can also make changes and updates to products in a snap --- which makes my weary self very, very happy.

I'll be adding products throughout the week and playing around with new packages of cards, as well as adding the calendar. If there's anything that you love or hate, feel free to drop me a line.

P.S., we met our goal for the Facebook fan page (yay) and everyone that was on the page as of November 1st will get a free card of their choosing (double-yay). If you're a fan, be on the lookout for a notice from either Lee or myself during the next week or so.

P.P.S., there's a FANTASTIC giveaway happening this month, so keep checking the blog for details soon.

But Then What *Are* Those Little Bits Floating In The Water?

Babies (and toddlers) don't know it's the weekend.  They have no idea that you're supposed to sleep in on Saturdays and Sundays. (and occasionally on Fridays and Mondays if it happens to be Easter or Thanksgiving or some other such day)  They get up when they get up.  Usually for us that means around 6:15 am.

I remember being a kid and running into my mum and dad's room and waking them up.  "Can you get me a glass of water?" my dad asked.  So gladly, my sister and I went traipsing off to the kitchen and returned with a glass.  "No," he said, " you have to let the tap run a bit longer than that.  See those little bits?  It's because the water sat in the pipes overnight.  You have get all that 'pipe water' out and wait until the fresh water comes."  So my sister and I went off and let the water run for a few minutes more and returned with another glass.  "Not quite yet," he said.  "Try a few minutes more."

To this day, I actually believed that there was such a thing as old "pipe water" that you had to flush out before getting to the good "drinking water".   I try to wash some dishes first thing in the morning to use up that no-good water.  I always let the water run a bit before taking a glass.  But it was only this morning, as I tried to convince the boy that I *did* want to play with him (at 5:15 in the morning) but that in order to play we needed his special red car, that I realized I had been duped oh-those-many-years ago.  As my boy ran off in search of his red car, I hoped that it would buy me at least another few minutes.  Then it struck me that my quest for "fresh water" was little more than my dad's equivalent of a snooze button for us.

It's quite a revelation.  I have probably wasted tens of thousands of gallons of fresh water in my lifetime because my dad wanted five more minutes of sleep.  And I wonder what things I may have said (or will say) which will have such an effect on the way the boys live their lives.   I wonder if Carol teaching him to yell  "Go, Go Suckah!" in the van is going to lead to something unpredictable in the future.  I wonder if the fact that every time I say "fresh", the boy responds with "funky fresh", will have some weird connotation later on in life.

I wonder.

Oh.  Why did the boy come in at 5:15 today instead of his usual 6:15?  Apparently, babies and toddlers don't know about Daylight Savings Time either.